"I saw you desperately trying to cram one more salty treat into America's already bloated snack hole."
After much consideration, kiddies, I have decided to start my own blog.
And this is it.
And while I can't promise that there will be anything earth-shattering, I can promise that there will be plenty of nods to the Simpsons and Cheers, and likely random bizarre references I don't expect you to get.
And maybe an 'Ovechkin's mom's a whore' joke. Or two.
Here's one of my favorites:
Ovechkin's mom is a whore.
See how this is gonna work?
Feel free to follow, comment, and pass it around like
[side note: only 1 girl, and 100 guys....it's no wonder they were blue!]
I hope you'll have fun here.
I know I will.
I also wanted to come up with a unique signature. Something that identified me.
Carol Burnett tugged her ear.
Johnny Carson swung an imaginary golf club.
Ann Coulter is a hateful cunt.
All unique, memorable identifiers.
So I'll be closing out each blog post with the following signature: